Tuesday, April 12, 2011

In which we lose taggie, I lose my mind and end up sobbing at the kitchen sink

I'm sure you've noticed that Emmy has her taggie with her pretty much all the time. It's in lots and lots of pictures and goes with us everywhere. She sleeps with taggie and her unicorn and has done so since she was 4 months old.
Last night we went upstairs after dinner to take a bath like always. She brought her taggie and unicorn upstairs and left them in the hallway while she and Aoife were in the bath. She brought them into the bedroom after the bath. After I helped the girls into their jammies I went downstairs to get Aoife a cup of water. The girls played in their room for the 2 minutes that I was downstairs. I came back up to read a story and tuck them into bed. Sometime in those 2 minutes taggie grew legs and wandered away - or fell down the hole in the floor that Aidan's DSi resides in. I couldn't believe it - where in the world did it go? We searched and searched their room and then the rest of the upstairs. It was gone. I told her that I would look downstairs but she had to go to bed. She didn't argue and fell asleep while I was looking downstairs - no dice. I spent the entire morning looking for taggie - still gone.
We went to the library for story time later in the morning. Aoife brought her baby - a stuffed purple baby that she loves. I swear we had it in the car but couldn't find it anywhere once we got inside. I searched the car, backyard and entire downstairs - I even called the library. WHAT??? Could we have lost 2 lovies within 24 hours?? How is that even possible? I have gone 6 years without losing a lovey and it is all coming crashing down around me!!
I spent the ENTIRE afternoon tearing the house apart. I felt like I was going absolutely crazy. You would have thought that I would have found at least one of the things I was looking for - or maybe even Aidan's DSi. I had to stop looking so I could make dinner but something was bothering me. Emmy wasn't looking for taggie and she didn't seem to even care that it was gone. I was scrubbing potatoes at the sink when I asked her if it bothered her that taggie was missing. She didn't even look at me. "No", she answered, "I don't really care." I look back at the potatoes in the sink and start choking sobbing. Thank goodness that the water was running and Word Girl was on - no one noticed the blubbering. How can she go from being bound to this little piece of fleece to not caring at all that it is gone? If we find it, will she care? It's hard to know. She's growing up though - that's for sure. Nothing's easy with her. She goes through sudden surges in independence and she doesn't look back. It breaks my heart and warms it at the same time.


Laurie said...

When I was in kindergarten, I left a stuffed bear on the bus. I hadn't meant to, it wasn't premeditated, but when my stop came up, I carefully placed the bear in the middle of the seat and got off the bus. There were frantic calls to the bus dispatcher and lost & found, but no one ever turned it in. To this day I have no idea why I left it there, it just must have been time. But no matter what, I still love my parents and appreciate what they did to try to find that bear. :-)

Sue said...

Now you know in your heart the bitter sweetness of being a parent!
<3 Mom

kim said...

Do you think she threw it away? My mom tells the story of how my brother just put his "lovie" in the trash. When asked why he just told her "I'm done with it." She said it was harder on her than it was with him.

Rains Family said...

I thought this was a cute story :) Why is it so much harder for us than them??